It is how you bounce
It is how you bounce
A question we use in many of our coaching sessions is “What is your number today?“
When you ask it the first time, clients tend to look at you like you’ve lost it. We then explain that it’s an invitation to self-reflect: On a scale from 0-10, how are you doing holistically? That provides a useful starting point for understanding which aspects of life might be adding to or subtracting from their overall life satisfaction at the moment, so they can make adjustments where needed.
I can remember one lady saying that her number was a perfect ten once. It came as a surprise, and we were both happy about it. I enjoyed listening to her list all the reasons life was so good.
Why am I sharing this?
There seems to be a misconception that gets mentioned now and again, that in order to be a high performer, you always need to be at a nine or ten on the scale. You either are a resilient person or you are not. You execute all your tasks, goals and plans perfectly, or you might as well not bother at all.
Is it just me, or have you heard and thought this to yourself as well?
Given the nature of our work, people let us in on what they are thinking. They give their number and tell us why it sits there on the scale. I can say this with complete honesty: Even the most impressive, high-performing, role-model worthy people go through dips. Sometimes these dips resemble deep valleys. They don’t live on the mountaintops as we would think. We ourselves have great periods and then other times, things happen that drag us down.
What can we do with this knowledge?
Firstly, if you find that you beat yourself up for not always being at your best, start by taking the pressure off. Realign your expectations. Yes, we should be aiming upwards, but no life is linear in that way.
Secondly, it really helps to know what you need to lift your head. For me, even the smallest bit of movement makes a difference. Going for a walk or a run, taking a bike ride, or doing something active, even at very low intensity, helps put me on the front foot. Talking to a friend or a loved one, even if it is about nothing serious, helps me reestablish a sense of connection and a new perspective. Doing something that nurtures my soul, like praying or doing something creative, makes a big difference.
Don’t get me wrong, none of these things immediately takes me from a six to a ten, but they move the needle ever so slightly. And cumulatively, consistency helps to get me through the valley.
The crux of the matter is this: You are not always going to feel it. But don’t let it stop you from showing up. Everybody has ups and downs. Accepting that takes a lot of pressure off. But also have a game plan to help you get through the tougher times.
I am not sure who needs to hear this today, but I sincerely hope that it gives you some perspective on what you might be going through.
If you are having a difficult time trying to lift your head, get in touch. You can reach us at info@purposeworks.co.za.
At PurposeWorks we are all about Making You and Your Work Rock. Our focus is on Organisational Health and Design, Employee Centered Culture, Leadership Development and Performance Coaching. For more information on how we can help you create a work environment that rocks, develop a great team, become an inspiring leader or unlock your personal excellence talk to us at info@purposeworks.co.za.
