Takeaways from a final goodbye

Takeaways from a final goodbye

This weekend I had to say goodbye to someone very dear to me. At the celebration of life ceremony, his brother shared a lot about their journey growing up together. I want to share a few takeaways I took from his story:

• Ask the questions, be curious:
Even though I’d known him all of my life, there was still so much I never knew about him. We often fail to ask the questions, and as a result, we lack the understanding and perspective needed to truly see people, care for them, and love them better.
• If we wait for the perfect moment, we may miss the opportunity completely:
Through raw emotion, he shared how he had always wanted to tell his brother he loved him but waited for the “right” time, and unfortunately, waited too long. He missed his chance. Don’t wait!!!
• Give people the opportunity to show you who they really are and who they want to be for you:
As kids, he and his brother never really got along. But when he got sick and had to let his guard down and be vulnerable, his brother stepped in and took care of him. Finally becoming the brother he had longed for all those years. How often are we stubbornly unwilling to let people see us at our most vulnerable? And then become resentful because they aren’t playing the role we expect them to play?
• Start being the person you want to become – today:
We often measure our commitment, loyalty, or the time we’re willing to sacrifice based on what others bring to the table. That can be incredibly limiting. If we live that way, we never become who we truly want to be. Start today, be the one who goes first.
• Don’t sweat the small stuff:
We (I know I do) tend to get worked up over things that, in the bigger picture, don’t matter much: the perfectly tidy house, frustrations when plans change, and so on. Accepting that most things that happen are outside our control can help us focus on what truly matters. Apologise when you’re wrong, take responsibility, and move forward.

In closing, every time I have to say a final farewell, I’m reminded how brief our time on this planet really is. It makes me recommit—again—to focusing on what matters most: the moment in front of us, the people we still get to hug, laugh with, and tell “I love you” while we still can.

Thank you for reading what’s been on my heart and mind over the past few weeks.

If you would like to share your thoughts, get in touch. You can reach us at info@purposeworks.co.za.

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