Talk to yourself like a friend
Last week we shared some very useful ideas from Jon Acuff’s new book Soundtracks: The Surprising Solution to Overthinking. The book is all about the recurring thoughts that we get caught up in when facing a challenge or going after a goal and it essentially comes down to the idea that we are very often our own biggest enemies in that “what we think gets in the way of what we want.” In case you missed last week’s piece you can catch up here.
The next part of the puzzle lies in interrogating these limiting thoughts to test their validity. Whenever you catch yourself repeating a thought that tells you why you can’t do something, ask yourself these three questions in this order:
- Is it true? Not everything you think is true. That’s just a fact. Just because an idea pops into your mind doesn’t make it real. Use that as your first filter to check the validity of the thought. If it is true, move on to the next checkpoint.
- Is it helpful? Does the thought move you closer to where you want to be? You might have failed your last biology test (which is true), but repeating that thought to yourself while prepping for the next one is definitely not helpful. Use that as evidence that the thought does not belong and needs to be evicted from your mind. If it is both true and helpful, move on to the last checkpoint.
- Is it kind? Notice that the choice of word – the thought doesn’t have to be nice, but kind. Kindness is the combination of truth and love. Are you saying things to yourself that are both true and loving? Like the things you would say to a friend you deeply care about. If not, cut it from your mind as soon as you catch it.
Having passed your thoughts through these filters, chances are you will end up with a lot less mental clutterthan you started of with. And you should be a lot closer to taking the first steps towards achieving your goal. Doing something (taking positive steps towards a valued goal) is very often the best antidote to overthinking, so it’s time to get cracking!
If you are taking a long weekend, we hope you are spending it well. Thank you for reading, we really do appreciate the support! Please share with anyone you feel could benefit from what we have to share.
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