The Upside of a Boring Life
The upside of a boring life
Last Friday, I spent some quality time with a friend I haven’t seen in a while. Over the last few years, the business he works for has experienced significant cash flow issues. To the extent that paying salaries was a continuous challenge. He told me that for the last three years, he would dread payday, never being sure whether he would get paid or not. Often, he wouldn’t. As the head of a household, that is immensely scary and challenging. During this period, the business went from employing more than 30 people to only six today. He is one of those who stuck around. Recently, the business secured large contracts that would guarantee its sustainability for several years. Suddenly, payday will take care of itself. Just imagine the expression of relief on his face as he shared this!
For years, he has hoped for life to be more predictable. To be boring. Now, for a while, hopefully it will be.
A couple of years ago, I discussed with my dad about this topic: Becoming aware of the fact that for our lives to be “boring”, many good things need to be in place that often go unnoticed. Being healthy, being employed, able to pay the bills, eating several times a day, sleeping indoors, having running water and electricity, having people around who love you (although they get on your nerves) – all wonderful things that millions of people have to go without.
The reason for highlighting this is not to sound preachy. Not at all. This last week, I’ve also had conversations with three people complaining about feeling stagnant and stuck in life. Their lives have become predictable to the level that it feels stale. This is also a very unpleasant feeling, one that I dislike myself. Human beings are wired with an unyielding need to feel progress and achievement. It is a basic desire to feel that we are moving forward in life, and that is a necessary and wonderful thing.
It has a name: The Progress Principle. The notion is based on research by Teresa Amabile and Steven Kramer, which states that making meaningful progress in work and/or life is the most significant factor in boosting motivation, engagement, and satisfaction. Small wins or incremental advancements create a positive feedback loop, enhancing emotions, productivity, and creativity. Conversely, setbacks can diminish motivation and lead to feeling stuck. Reaching a milestone can spark joy and drive, while constant obstacles without progress lead to frustration. The principle emphasises the importance of recognising and facilitating small, tangible achievements to sustain momentum in any area of life.
If you find yourself in a position of feeling stuck, I would like to propose two complementary viewpoints:
- Notice the good: Become more aware of the “basics” that are in place that allow your life to feel boring. When we notice the areas where we are already lucky and blessed, it opens us up to becoming aware and acting on more opportunities to move forward in life. People who consider themselves lucky often are luckier!
- Pick something to get better at: It can be anything. Learn to play three chords on the guitar. Do pushups for 21 days in a row. Read one page a day. Start having more regular date nights. Whatever you like, pick something you can track and see progress on. Even if you feel very stuck in one area of life, like work, making progress in another area will help you gain a sense of momentum. And this sense tends to translate across life domains.
As always, thank you for reading. We really do appreciate your time and attention. If you have found this valuable, please share it with someone else who could also benefit from getting unstuck.
If you are feeling stuck, get in touch. You can reach us at info@purposeworks.co.za.
At PurposeWorks we are all about Making You and Your Work Rock. Our focus is on Organisational Health and Design, Employee Centered Culture, Leadership Development and Performance Coaching. For more information on how we can help you create a work environment that rocks, develop a great team, become an inspiring leader or unlock your personal excellence talk to us at info@purposeworks.co.za.
